I Did Not Teach My Children the Alphabet

In a recent discussion, Marnellie asked me what I did at the beginning of homeschool. She was surprised when I mentioned never teaching my children the alphabet. Our lessons have not included A is for Apple worksheets, or practicing the alphabet song. So how did my children learn letter names and ask others to sing along?

A is for Apple

Only one child suffered through recreating school at home. My oldest had to sit in a desk and raise his hand to speak. Anxiety pushed me and he resisted. His own perfectionism collided with mine.

Wobbly letters on tear stained pages remind me of those first steps into homeschool. I regret squelching my son’s excitement for learning those first weeks.

Thankfully, I spoke with the teacher who taught me Writing Road to Reading after the first fits. She admonished me to slow down. I thought I was doing everything right, but the book led me and fear drove me. Her words spoken with the confidence of experience brought peace.

It will come with practice. Relax. School shouldn’t be so hard.

Those words come back to me often. It has taken me years to relax, but I’m beginning to understand. Slow, steady progress is difficult to see when you sit next to it day after day.

A few years earlier, when Bug was still toddling around in a diaper I asked that same teacher how to prepare for school. Images of flashcards swirled in my mind. Her words scattered them.

Play with him and read a lot. That is the best foundation you can give him.

I took her advice. We did not work on numbers or letters. We just built blocks and talked while reading books.

Formal lessons began with Bug learning phonograms, the sounds the letters make, not the A,B,C’s. I taught him how to form the letters, how to say the sounds, and mentioned spelling rules, such as q is followed by u. And when he knew alphabetical order without any further instruction, I realized some things don’t have to be written in lesson plans.

Children learn far more than we realize by playing, listening, and living.