Keep the Memories, Get Rid of the Stuff
One computer failed to revive even after the skillful hands of my husband tried to resuscitate it. Another wants to read and type, so I wait.
A week goes by and this place is silent. Words begin to trip over themselves trying to escape. Perhaps it’s good to let them crash around once in awhile. They bounce and the momentum slows. Words pile up in my mind, but other piles come into view. The piles stored in dark corners.
I yank stuff out of my dingy, crammed closet. Clothes that don’t fit. Mounds of mending. Broken toys. Unfinished projects. The pile of castoffs grows to a dangerous height.
I pull out the cabinet that hides fabric, scissors, patterns, and thread to reach the shelf above. Memories are stashed in boxes there.
A ratty, rotten cuddly. Teeny, tiny preemie clothes. Handmade wooden horses missing their legs.
Then I see the broken snow globe pushed to the back of the shelf with intentions to restore it. Jagged glass surrounds a angel with a misplaced hand. Baby Jesus reaches for the missing shimmers. This shattered token of love reminds me of my first days as Mrs. Renae Deckard.
It is broken. It hasn’t been fixed in five years. Did I keep it for fear I’d forget?
As a young mother, I stumbled across my mother’s journal. My giggle was not because her notes were funny, but because I was delighted. She planted a garden. She made a birthday cake. She sewed a dress for me while she waited for my dad to come home from work. The common every day jotted in a plain writing tablet. A few pages of tasks she’d accomplished. And it was a treasure to me.
My childhood toys are gone. I do have a baby blanket and two little dresses my grandfather picked out before he died. They don’t take up much room. However, the memories of a childhood full of wonder fill my heart.
Won’t my children desire the same? A few glimpses stored on a page or a blog, in a scrapbook or a box mean more than a closet full of stuff.
Inspired by Dana’s post “Can blogging get in the way of living?”
Oh, did you write this for me? You could have, you know. :)
It’s so true, so important. I’m in the process of narrowing down as much stuff as possible. Taking a picture helps with some things.
Andrea,
I actually did think of you even though I started this post last week. ;)
It is hard to let go sometimes. Blogging helps me remember the important things. And yes, pictures don’t take up very much room. Someday I’ll inherit shoe boxes full from my mother. Maybe by then I’ll be able to keep only the best for posterity…
Thinking of you and your memorial Tupperware.
Oh, how I can relate! I’m getting better at throwing broken stored-to-be-fixed junk away, but my dilemma has been what to do with all of the children’s art. Pictures are the answers, aren’t they? I’m not a great scrapbooker. I mean…my scrapbooking looks like garbage, but I suppose it’s better to preserve the memories in my own crappy style than save box upon box of work or lose it entirely.
I needed this today. My mom died a year ago and I found one of her old journals too. We dont need all the extra stuff building up. Just some of the little things. I’m working on getting rid of broken and torn things too. Nice to know I’m not alone.
This actually brought tears to my eyes. I lost my mom about three years ago. I would love to have something so precious as what you described. Unfortunately my childhood curiosity destroyed most of those types of things long ago- the young artist needs things to draw on you see. But even now, some scrap that has her handwriting on it is still a treasure to me.
Thanks for this post.
Anne-Marie,
Your question may inspire another blog post. I have been trying to figure out what to do with my children’s artwork too. I have a few ideas, but they are only half implemented.
Rana,
I am sorry for your loss. I’m glad you have something so precious from your mother. It reminds me how important it is to capture my stories for my children.
As it is, they will inherit a stack of journals. There should be enough for each of them to have a shelf full. They may take my advice and get rid of a few. ;)
Miss Julie,
Thank you for sharing. I’m humbled you were touched. I can’t imagine saying goodbye to my mother. I know it must still be so hard.
Even your memory of your mother is more precious than a journal though. Paper fades. I don’t even know what happened to those slips of paper I found helping my mom clean out the garage. They may have found their way to the trash, but I still remember reading them.
Beautiful, Renae.
[...] agreed with me about getting rid of stuff, but wonders what to do with her children’s artwork. I’ve been wondering the same thing [...]
My turn, Renae! This was excellent! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. Such important reasons for keeping a “memorial”…hmmm, the Lord has given us “memorials” in the scriptures…okay, time to read and study! :-)
[...] presents Keep the Memories, Get Rid of the Stuff posted at Life Nurturing [...]
Parents Helping Parents Carnival XI…
photo by extra medium
Welcome to the Eleventh edition of the Parents Helping Parents Carnival! For this edition, I have selected 12 of the best submissions I have received over the past two weeks. Check them out below and I hope you enjoy them as much …
I have all my children’s clothes from when they were babies. They are now 15 and 17 years. I have all their school work and other stuff like wedding presents that we don’t use. i even have some clothes from over 20 years ago. I’ve been married 22 years in August. My kids are embarrassed to have friends over. I also don’t like having people see the mess. Every thing has sentimental value to me, yet it’s overtaking my house. My spare bedroom has a small path for my husband to get to his closet. I can hardly get to my bed in my own bedroom because of boxes. My garage is full of boxes and my back porch is, also. I quit working 3 years ago to clean the house, yet it hasn’t happened. I don’t know where to start. I’ve been to 4 therapists, including a psycologist and a social worker, and 2 psyciatrists who have given me medicine. Nothing helps. I’m at the point where I need to do something. My son will be graduating high school next year and I’d like his last year at home to be normal. Please help me with any suggestions. I would truly appreciate it. Thanks so much.
Pam