Motivating Students with Relevant Lessons
On weekends I clean houses. Other people’s homes receive a precise polishing while mine remains in shambles. My clients don’t have three children who change clothes every time they go to the bathroom, so it’s easy to wash their counters and mop their floors. I don’t have to unearth them first.
While applying elbow grease, I enjoy the quiet or listen to a strange mix of Ravi Zacharias, Michael Buble, and Rich Mullins on my iPod. Last weekend I brought someone new.
Andrew Pudewa instructed me how to Teach Boys and Other Children Who Would Rather Make Forts All Day. He discussed the research of Dr. Sax who wrote Why Gender Matters. That information was fascinating, but that’s not where my thoughts settled.
I want my children to complete their lessons with joy, not drudgery. I try to avoid the lecture, “You have to study so you can go to college and get a good job.” However, when math problems glare or sentences wait, encouragement is muted. The pout comes. Arms cross. Nose rises.
How can I defuse the hostile resistance? Laughter helps. Waiting helps. But can this be avoided, at least, in part?
Mr. Pudewa believes some of the struggle has to do with relevancy. If a child is learning what is applicable to their lives, they will study. Then he addresses four types of relevancy:
- Intrinsic- a natural interest
- Inspired- the teacher shares her passion for the subject
- Contrived- games and rewards
- Forced- learn this or else
I understand intrinsic interest of the child. That is why my son knows the language of Star Wars and the history of Lego without any instruction. He reads science books, and asks questions about atomic fusion I can’t answer. If everything fell into this category, my son would teach himself what he needs to know. A number of subjects require practice though: math, penmanship, spelling, and writing.
For these subjects, my excitement can make up the difference. I teach why we study numbers and words. My love for the subject can ignite a desire, but sometimes it doesn’t.
Forced relevancy is simple to understand. But what about contrived relevancy? I’m not exactly sure how to implement the economic system Mr. Pudewa discussed.
He used this example.
If you complete your math sheet with only three wrong answers in 20 minutes you get 20 points. If you miss only 2 you will get 25 points, etc. If you do not complete this assignment in 20 minutes, you owe me points, because it is not my job to do your work for you.
I’ve resisted these types of rewards. I don’t want to bribe my children to do the work required of them. This might be a better middle step though. I jump from trying to inspire a love for math to negative consequences for not completing assignments.
I tried it this week. One day my son earned time to play video games for completing his lessons in a timely manner. It worked well, but I still question. What is the difference between rewards and bribery? How do you encourage your children in the tedium?
People pay me to do the dirty, detail work. It definitely makes it easier and worthwhile.
This is a tough one. I try to keep positive motivation to a natural consequence. For example…
I would love to take you to the park today but we won’t be able to go unless our work is done before “x” time.
Dad said he would like to take you to the store on his motorcycle if you can get your handwriting done nicely and by the time he is ready to leave.
I have a poster up of the solar system for my son. He starts daily on Earth. He moves closer to Pluto as he finishes each subject with a cheerful attitude. Bad attitudes move him towards the sun where he is TOAST if he lands on it. It is a nice visual for him and keeps him on task. Dad makes a point of looking at it daily and praising successes but there is no tangible reward.
I see bribery as offering money, toys, candy and other items out of the norm for things that SHOULD be done anyway. In other words, I’m not giving you a piece of candy for doing your math lesson. However, for EXTRAS I will offer an incentive. Whenever my children hit 30 books read (not school books, not required reading) they get a coupon (they can pick skipping a subject for the day, having Mom make your bed for a week, picnic at the park, etc.)
Each parent has to decide where that line is. My husband does not offer incentives in his public classroom. He tells the students that hard work is a valuable character trait and something to be done regardless of whether ones action are ever recognized or not. Now, with that said, he is very careful to give verbal praise for hard work. He just doesn’t offer candy, stickers,….
I could never do points. Who has the time to keep up with that??
I do agree that relevancy makes a difference. However, the reality is that there are just times in life when we HAVE to do things we may not like. Ever since the curse was placed on Adam – having to work hard and sweat – there is an unpleasantness involved in certain tasks. None of us is ever free of that.
So while I agree that it’s important to use the relevance factor, it’s also important to learn how to do ALL things as unto the Lord – those we love and those we don’t. :D
Daisy,
Thank you for sharing your ideas. I try to use natural consequences, as well.
The points were only an example, but I agree. We used a chore chart that had tokens for awhile. I could keep up with one kid, but there’s no way I’d manage with three. I’m crazy enough already. :)
Dianne,
Yes, that’s true, and it is hard to learn.
I remember feeling so sorry for myself when I had to vacuum. I pretended I was Cinderella; my mom was so mean. Now I see that she wasn’t mean enough. I took all the work she did for granted, and lacked skills I needed to care for my own home.
And thanks for the reminder. That’s one of my favorite verses. Isn’t it to all perfectionists? ;)
Interesting discussion. And a difficult one. This “contrived relevancy” has been identified as a rather negative factor in public schools and can actually kill motivation.
I actually did a whole series on this once upon a time, although I don’t think we knew each other way back in the spring of ‘o6. I hope you don’t mind the link, but here is the series. It of course makes more sense if you start from the bottom and work your way up.
The extrinsic motivation (contrived relevancy) can be a problem, and studies actually demonstrate that increased extrinsic motivation can decrease intrinsic motivation and eventually even performance. But of course, children still need consequences, both positive and negative, to be trained.
How to find the balance is a question worthy of much consideration. I don’t pretend to have solved it. I was merely exploring thoughts and Carole Adams essay on The Christian Idea of the Child. But I think the key is somewhere in post introducing the series, Motivation Defined. We need to look at extrinsic motivators (contrived relevance) as an extension of some internal motivation, not an end in itself, so that we are really working on the heart of the child and not just training them to perform the tasks we set before them.
Dana,
Of course, I don’t mind the links, but my spam filter did. :(
Your articles are extremely helpful, and I will review them again after a good night’s sleep.
I’m not sure how I missed Carole Adam’s insights. The link in your post didn’t work, but I found her essay as a pdf here. I’ll be printing it off to study.
Webster’s 1828 has no definition for motivation, but motive means,
I’m sure you already know that, but I found it interesting. The will is internal, so your point about extrinsic motivators is well taken.
Thank you for contributing to the discussion. You’ve given me some valuable things to think about.
I read this post twice. Some of your deeper posts take that. I think that the majority of my ‘teaching’ is ‘inspired.’ Not to pat myself on the back or anything, but I just enjoy learning now as I’m aging. a)science….how can you not MARVEL at our AMAZING GOD? B)history….this is just so amazing! Listen to how this army dealt with that attack! wow…C)math…Isn’t it cool that Daddy uses trig at work? Building things?
I actually want to use contrived more, as I’m not at all against rewards. My 5th grade teacher was the king of that. I still remember THAT teacher, above all others in grade school. He inspired me when he read, “Where the Red Fern Grows” and started crying. Books became even more powerful. (they made a grown man cry!) and he rewarded the students who did well on lessons by allowing us to read chapters aloud to the other kids. Oh man….I sooooo loved that bribe.
my .02.
Hi!
I love the look of your blog, and your writing is so thoughtful. Well done! You might also enjoy my interview with Andrew Pudewa on my blog at:
http://classicalscholar.com/2007/10/23/andrew-pudewa-interview/
He chats with me about how his family moved over time from a classical private school education in Idaho to more of a leadership style education.
Enjoy!
Diane
Hi Renae!
I believe our sons w/b best buds! I’m struggling with the exact same things. We talk a lot about how doing his lessons is the job that God has given him for this specific time and he’s proven that he can do the work. He’s 9 and would rather growl at me and pout. We’ve talked a lot about the consequences of this type of attitude. I believe it’s truly a heart issue and that I continue to pray for guidance. I’m tired of yelling, that’s for sure. I’ve thought about removing every lego in the house until the attitude chances. I hope I don’t have to go there! It’s discouraging, but I’m thankful God is bigger and I know that my son wants to obey Him. We press on.
I use an approach similar to Daisy. Usually, they play at the park with their friends every afternoon, so I remind them that they need to get their studies done, or they can’t go.
I think making the subjects interesting plays an important role. For example, they disliked history until we switched to Story of the World, which is a more interesting text. Sometimes, I think, they need a little push to discover their intrinsic interest in a subject. After all, how can you know you like something until you try it?
Also, sometimes the kids motivate each other. My 11yo does not always want to do work, so I will start with my 10yo and then he will see us having a good time and join in.
Daisy – I love the solar system idea! I have been looking for a good visual aid to use for tracking behaviors that the kids are working on and I think they would respond well to that.
Yes, that is a tough one! I began my homeschooling journey with the unschoolish notion that everything should be done out of the intrinsic motivation of fun and interest. But gradually my perspective changed. Once I put my foot down and told my dd that we would be doing reading lessons every day and that we were going to do them a certain way, she quit fighting me over it and quickly became an enthusiastic reader. I don’t allow bad attitudes or whining anymore; they get a warning and then lose some playtime with friends if it keeps on. I had to realize that they — not I — must be responsible for the attitude with which they approach things, and that they should not expect everything to be easy or entertaining, but that they must bring their own creativity to necessary or repetitive tasks which do not hold intrinsic interest for them. It’s not that I don’t try to make a game, or find something to pique their interest, but when I see that the more effort I am putting into something, the less effort they are putting in and the whining starts up, I’ve learned to put on the brakes and make *them* figure it out. It takes two to tango, after all.
That said, here’s what we often do with math: get so many right (ten or fifteen or however many I think is reasonable based on the difficulty of the problems) and you’re done. This often means they are done in a few minutes rather than having to slog through the whole page at one sitting, and they are motivated to work carefully knowing that correct work leads to being done for the day. We also do lots of mental math at the grocery store and when cooking, which they enjoy. Another useful tool has been a timer; work for 15 minutes with attention, and then you can stop, even if you aren’t done. (Fooling around or whining adds a minute to the timer.) This has really seemed to help them see that the way to get through a less-than-motivating task is to put their mind on it with a positive attitude; they are often surprised and pleased with how much they complete in that time.
The hard thing about rewards is that they can become expected– then they aren’t the motivators that we want them to be.
But like you said, in the “real world” people are going to ask our kids to do things for money. They are going to pay them to think, to write, and to do math.
We hope they will do it because they love it. We know that they need to do it. They need to learn that there are things that we need to do that we do not like to do. (Unless there truly people out there that like taking out the garbage and cleaning the toilet, and changing stinky diapers…)
There’s a balance out there, and I think that Daisy’s point about giving for doing something extra is going along the right lines– and that the bar should constantly be set higher.
Renae, excellent!! I need this right now. I’m following some links, listening to the Andrew P. interview as I write, and I just printed out the Carole Adams article. Thank you so much…
Emily,
I’m not sure if that is a good thing or not. Ravi Zacharias talks about the need for truth to be subtle, but I don’t want to be so subtle you don’t understand what I’m saying. :P
On this post, it’s probably harder, because I’m really asking a question.
I’m not sure how to use contrived relevance. We can appeal to different interests of our children, and not appealing to greed and selfishness can be difficult. That is why I resist giving money, etc.
Your experience in school is a good example, because the reward of reading was delighting in the story. Those are the kinds of rewards I want to be promote.
Melissa,
Yes, it sounds like our sons would be great friends, and that they struggle with the same attitudes. But don’t we all? Some days I don’t want to study math either, but somehow we need to learn to do right despite our feelings.
I don’t have the answer, but I agree. It is a heart issue. Even the idea of relevancy deals with the internal stuff. Each individual is created uniquely with different interests and talents.
The one thing that does motivate both my son and me is our desire to love and obey God. Appealing to conscious and giving time for the Holy Spirit to work is so important.
Charity,
Right. Textbooks can be so boring. Most of them examine facts void of any greater purpose. I try to help my children see what God did in history, how he moved and worked in the lives of men and nations. And how he is still doing that today.
Rebecca,
I had to realize that they — not I — must be responsible for the attitude with which they approach things, and that they should not expect everything to be easy or entertaining, but that they must bring their own creativity to necessary or repetitive tasks which do not hold intrinsic interest for them. I heartily agree!
My goal isn’t to make school fun. I’m tired of the entertainment focus, even in our churches.
There is value in doing something hard: the feeling of accomplishment. It builds faith, too. Look at David. He new he could slay Goliath, because God helped him kill a bear and a lion.
And I really like your ideas about math. Thanks for sharing them! I’ve used a mental timer for my own unpleasant tasks. It doesn’t take long to wash the dishes. It’s the dreading it and putting it off that take forever.
MInTheGap,
You touched on something that I’ve been thinking about since I read Dianne’s comment.
People pay me to clean for them, but the reason they pay me as much as they do (some have given me unasked for raises) is because of my true motives. Yes, my family needs the money right now, but I work as unto the Lord. My clients trust me to do an excellent job for them. If all I cared about was the money, I would cut a lot of corners.
Jennifer,
I’m so glad you were blessed. Please let me know your thoughts as you reflect on the information. I’m sure I will write more about this as I continue to think and research.
I am struggling with this with my 16yo. She is rapidly getting disillusioned with homeschool, I think largely because she is bored and is really missing her old school and her friends. I find that reward systems don’t work as well with her, since there’s not much she really loves that I can afford to reward her with. I’ll probably be addressing this issue in my blog soon too.
Renae said, “I’m tired of the entertainment focus, even in our churches.”
I was volunteering in the preschool program at our church last year and one week the woman who was there with me took out a Bible and said to the kids, “This is the Bible. It is where the story you just heard (on the video) came from. Videos are fun to watch, but this is the word of God in this book!” She was so fed up with the focus on multi-media entertainment.
Our house is not a dictatorship. After the kids reach a certain age (and probably younger than you think), they are *mostly* treated as part of the family, and not as kids to be bossed around anymore.
For instance, recently when Hubby was trying to solve the “the toys don’t get picked up as often as we’d like” issue, he suggested we get a toy time-out box. Not a new idea. But it’s the way the box is used. It’s not only a means of controlling “the kids” stuff but all of our stuff. Because, face it, Hubby and I leave things around where they don’t belong. We forget to put our shoes in the closet, etc. Why should only the children be put to punishment? So the box also holds our things if we forget to put them away. We have a family UNIT, not a Parents VS Kids thing.
Learning can be much the same. I don’t force my kids to do multiplication tables or writing exercises every day. But their favorite thing to do is read. My 3yDD loves to play with letters and numbers. My older kids read to her. My 5yDD writes stories left and right…about all kinds of animals. She also loves to do artwork of any kind. My 7yDS loves anything to do with science. And what one likes, the others get involved in. When Hubby gets interested in a documentary on the History Channel, often it will bring up great history discussions. Books bring lots of history in focus. Social studies is all around us all the time but we find fun ways to study it, such as our big Chinese New Year gala this past spring.
I know mine are young but I haven’t found a need to force knowledge yet. I do expect them to do their part in helping the household function (some people call that ‘chores’ but I dislike the negative connotation in that word) so there is instruction involved in that. But it’s not been something that involves me screaming and coming to a stand-off with them over.
It’s so interesting to me to see people who chose to bring their kids home from school and still do it the same way school does. There’s really no need. Education isn’t about seeing how many facts you can push into a kid…it’s about teaching them to THINK and know how to get the answers if they need them. I’m probably too unschoolish for you, but these are my thoughts. ;)
Laurie,
Thank you for visiting my blog. I completely agree with your statement about education. Education is not memorizing facts. My focus is to help my children learn to reason and grow in self-government. However, I do believe children need to practice certain things.
I do not drill my children for facts. Our math program includes lots of games, and our spelling lessons are short. Perhaps this post gives the wrong impression of our homeschool, but I’m just trying to reason through my questions about how best to encourage my children, my son especially. My other two are little.
You are correct in assuming I’m not an unschooler. ;) I didn’t even know such a thing existed before I started blogging a year ago. I do agree with some of the ideas, but, honestly, I don’t know much about the philosophy.
I’m very stubborn, so it would take a lot to convince me to change course now that I’ve researched and thought through my own philosophy of education. I do appreciate learning and hearing from others though, because I know I don’t have everything figured out.
It’s neat how it works, isn’t it? When we focus on doing something for a reason other than the money (serving God, providing the best service, providing for family, whatever) we find that the money comes quickly behind.
The focus can never be the money, but it is an end product.
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